He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
