well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
