You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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