yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
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