Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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