Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Come share oat with me in your robe
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
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