3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
