can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
