Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
