My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Randomize
