I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
