Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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