Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize