Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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