Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
My vagina just clenched in fear
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize