and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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