It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
