do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize