A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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