Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
