Whod you bang
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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