I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
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