9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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