Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
