Already got asked if we're dating
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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