If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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