Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize