in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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