My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
