If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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