I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
