how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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