i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
