Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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