And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
