How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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