Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
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