I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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