if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
