Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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