Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
