8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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