We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize