We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
