Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
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