I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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