Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
