I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
