There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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