and my herpes radar will keep us safe
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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