i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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