i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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