Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
